Content Warning: This article discusses topics of suicide, mental health disorders, and psychiatric treatments. Reader discretion is advised.

Luna, a 25-year-old Colombian immigrant who is also a practicing veterinarian, shares with us her compelling recount of her journey with Ketamine treatment. Despite numerous years under psychiatric care and multiple medications, her severe depression, anxiety, and PTSD remained unchecked. Luna turned to Ketamine as a last resort and found it to be highly effective in reducing her suicidal ideation and ameliorating her depression and anxiety levels. Describing Ketamine as a “revolutionary” medicine, she’s optimistic about the potential of Ketamine, alongside other psychedelics, in treating a range of mental health disorders.

Luna, please tell us a little about yourself.

I was born in Colombia but migrated to the United States at a young age. I spent most of my childhood there before returning to Colombia to study veterinary medicine. Currently, I am licensed to practice veterinary medicine in Colombia and am starting the process to be recognized as a veterinarian in the United States.

How did you get into Ketamine?

I have been dealing with mental health issues since childhood. At eight years old, I was diagnosed with severe depression, which later escalated into suicidal ideation. My mental health journey began at 13 when I was hospitalized for my first suicide attempt. Despite receiving therapy and different antidepressants, the conventional mental health treatments weren't effective for me.

As an adult, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) improved my condition, but I still struggled with deep-rooted depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. Aside from BPD, I have been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, social anxiety, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). 

I had been under psychiatric care for years, taking various antidepressants and even antipsychotics, which caused severe side effects. Over time, I lost hope in psychiatry and thought I'd have to live with my mental health conditions. However, hearing about the use of psychedelics in psychiatry, including ketamine, rekindled my hope.

Were there any other aspects beyond your conditions that drew you to Ketamine?

I found discussions on the spiritual aspects of Ketamine. Some users reported transcendental experiences during their “K Hole” trips. While this aspect didn't attract me, the potential medical applications did. For years, Ketamine has been studied for psychiatric conditions, and now, research is exploring its use for chronic pain management. Chronic pain significantly reduces quality of life, and if existing medications aren't practical, new applications like Ketamine could be transformative. Its potential extends beyond psychiatry or other neurological conditions like Alzheimer's, furthering its appeal and research opportunities.

Did you have any reservations about Ketamine at all?

Keeping in mind that many doctors have preconceptions about substances like CBD and ketamine, I'd like to believe I am open-minded and progressive. I approached ketamine research without any preconceived notions or judgments. Yes, ketamine is used as a horse sedative, but the dosage difference is considerable. I didn't approach my research with bias or judgment. I don't stigmatize these substances over others like tobacco and alcohol, which are legal yet harmful. Psychedelics, like any substance, have misuse potential, requiring caution and resources for addiction. However, in medical use, the dosages are low, controlled, and prescribed by a doctor. So, I didn't have any reservations about ketamine treatment.

Did you have any expectations going into your first experience?

I explored forums where people shared diverse experiences with ketamine. Some reported life-altering trips during their infusions; others experienced no significant changes or didn't trip at all. However, the science shows ketamine soothes emotional pain and stimulates neuron growth, helping mental health. So, I entered my own experience open to any outcome, knowing that even without a transformative trip, the medication could still be effective due to its neurological impact.

"I approached ketamine research without any preconceived notions or judgments."

What was your first experience with Ketamine like?

In the lounge, I felt safe and supported by the staff. They prepared me for the session, ensuring I was comfortable and informed about the IV and monitoring devices. I laid down, wore light-blocking eye masks, and listened to calming music. During the experience, I had visuals guided by music, like a journey through different themes of colors and lights. Despite my poor memory, I recall seeing gummy bears and talking a lot, expressing gratitude for life and the people in it. A friend accompanied me once and recorded my nonsensical words. Although my trips didn't lead to profound revelations, they revealed my subconscious desire to live a good life.

Do you feel that Ketamine helped you?

Before starting Ketamine, I was dealing with intense suicidal ideation and was at high risk of attempting suicide. I turned to Ketamine as my last hope, and remarkably, from the first session, it completely relieved my suicidal thoughts. It felt like a switch had been flipped. I no longer thought about suicide. It seemed alien to me even when I deliberately tried to think about it.

From the first infusion, Ketamine seemed to save my life. Research shows that a single infusion can reduce suicidal ideation, but multiple infusions can help with treatment-resistant depression. Having suffered from treatment-resistant depression for most of my life, I decided to undergo various sessions. After six sessions, I noticed a significant change in my depression symptoms.

Before starting Ketamine, I lived with constant depression, like a persistent fog surrounding me. After Ketamine, the fog lifted. It also alleviated my continuous anxiety. I can still become anxious or depressed in response to specific events or triggers, but I'm no longer living in a constant state of depression and anxiety.

My friends, family, and the clinic staff all noticed a change in my mood, behavior, and demeanor after the treatments. After returning home to Colombia from Miami, where I had the treatments, I was shocked at the state of my apartment—a classic "depression nest." I had either not noticed or not cared about the mess before the treatments. After returning, I felt compelled to clean and organize my living space for the first time, which I took as a sign that the Ketamine had worked.

"Before starting Ketamine, I lived with constant depression, like a persistent fog surrounding me. After Ketamine, the fog lifted."

If you had one word to describe your experience, what would it be?

Life-changing. 

I spent my life being told by psychiatrists and therapists that there was no actual treatment for suicidal ideation and that I would have to live with it. But now, I know there's a medication that can effectively alleviate this symptom that significantly affects my quality of life.

I'm also excited about the potential applications of Ketamine and psychedelics, in general, in the psychiatric field. For instance, if psychiatric hospitals started offering infusions to suicidal patients, it could be revolutionary. Psychiatric holds can keep you safe, but they don't treat or eliminate suicidal ideation. While typical medications can take weeks to work and may have severe side effects, Ketamine infusions are fast, extremely effective, and have few side effects.

So, I would also describe Ketamine as life-changing for me and revolutionary for the medical field. It's exciting to see ongoing research and potential applications for Ketamine and other psychedelics in treating various disorders and conditions.

"From the first infusion, Ketamine seemed to save my life."

If you connected with the above write-up, are curious, and need some guidance, psychedelic medicines such as Ketamine can support this healing process, self-discovery, and purpose. Click below to find out more.

Author: Bre Jenkins

Bre Jenkins, a certified health coach, previously worked in mainstream wellness before shifting her focus to energy healing and psychedelic medicine to support deep healing and personal expansion. She is certified in Reiki levels 1, 2, and 3, as well as Inner Dance and Psychedelic Integration. Her work has been featured in major publications, and she is also a significant voice in the psychedelics space, contributing to renowned psychedelic companies such as Doubleblind Mag, Third Wave, The Ancestor Project, and more.